Spell Checker, You Are a JERK! (No…I Didn’t Mean “J-U-R-K,” You “More On!”) Want Accurate Writing? Check It Yourself!

 

Spell Checker (and Grammar Checker), You Are a JERK!

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(No…I Didn’t Mean "J-U-R-K," You "More On!")

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Want Accurate Writing? Check It Yourself!

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If ewe donut want to make a miss steak use spell checker and gram marr checker four in creased accuracy when u right. It’s grate for your blog two.

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What a nightmare! Spell Checker (and your alter-ego Grammar Checker), you truly are stupid, out-of-date or asleep-at-the-wheel…that, or your inventors need to send you back to school for a refresher course! Millions upon millions rely on you every single day, yet you have the potential and capacity to let people down, look like idiots and, in extreme cases, lose their jobs or get passed over for jobs for which they apply!

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A Sentence or Two Dissected:

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"Nurse, scalpel.." Yes, back to those two sentences I constructed which you saw at the top of this article:

"If ewe donut want to make a miss steak use spell checker and gram marr checker four in creased accuracy when u right. It’s grate for your blog two."

Two sentences that I, yes, ran through WORD‘s Spell Checker and its "partner in crime," Grammar Checker. It indeed passed the test. The results:

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 1) "You" is what was called for. A "Ewe" is a female sheep. Out of context, but not caught.

 2) "Donut" has been mistakenly substituted for "don’t." Obviously out of context, it is missed by Spell Checker/Grammar Checker.

 3) "Miss Steak" has been erroneously substituted for "mistake." Missed by Spell Checker/Grammar Checker.

 4) "Four" is a number. "For" is quite obviously the intended word. Again, missed by the system.

 5) The word "blog," in our modern lexicon for the better part of a decade now, is still not recognized by Spell Checker as being a word.

Okay, enough examples to make my point.

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Conclusion:

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Spell Checker/Grammar Checker is a great tool for a superficial, cursory check of your work. It can pick up glaring, blatant errors in spelling, punctuation and grammar.

But when you are writing in a framework of establishing credibility, reputation and expertise, arenas in which precision, image and presentation are just as important as content, it is not enough!

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Oh, the fun in testing the system! It doesn’t know the difference between "stationary" and "stationery." "Prescribe" and "proscribe." "Formally" and "formerly." I type "He is definitely right"…it tells me I’m wrong and suggests I use "He is defiantly right." "She surprised me with a party?" Nope…"She surpassed me with a party." While writing an article recently, I entered: "He earned fifteen dollars." No. Try "He. Earned fifteen dollars." the system prompted me. What???

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When it comes to blog articles, resumes, letters of correspondence, official emails, job inquiries, cover letters, portfolios, white papers, business plans and the like, accuracy is essential. Just one error can bring down the level of the writing. Two or three can completely and utterly destroy it!

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Be sure, after using Spell Checker, to go over the work again with an eagle-eye and a fine-tooth comb. Give a human being the chance to catch what a machine is inclined, or in this case…programmed, to miss!

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Deer Humane Resources Manager,

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It is with grate pleasure that I am apple eyeing for the jobe.

I fell that I can bee a great ass set to yore company!

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Dear Spell Checker/Grammar Checker Designers,

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Continuing Education is a hallmark of our educational system and our society.

It allows for the periodic and systematic opportunity for one to return to Academia, expand one’s knowledge base and acquire the additional skills necessary for survival in the modern world.

I believe it is high time that you send Spell Checker back to school to learn to correct long-standing misconceptions, re–learn basic spelling and grammatical rules and add words which have come into existence and the current lexicon since its creation.

Then, and only then, will it become a tool that we as businesspeople can rely on.

Sincerely,

Yonatan Maisel

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Dear Reader: Thanks for stopping by! If you’ve enjoyed this original article, please consider giving it a "Retweet." I’d be most appreciative!

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_____________________

Looking for a writer  yo*****@******************ip.com

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Yonatan Maisel is a business blogger, history buff and author.

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If you’re looking for a "lap-dog," look elsewhere; if you’re looking for a writer who will "kick ass and take names," he might be for you! 

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Yoni started a business blog one year ago. 90% of his new clients now find their way to him as a direct result of having read one or more posts. He is a regular contributor here at www.jobshuk.com.

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Image Credits: Alphabet: babygadget.net; Doctor with Scalpel: mcv.ganewsnetwork.com;  Woman with Magnifying Glass: thinkbda.com; Back to School: brookings.k12.org; Advice: htmlgiant.com; Thumb Down: onsecurities.com; This Is Only a Test: macmillanusa.com; Quill and ink: picsicio.us

Famines and Feasts; Droughts and Deluges: The Roller-Coaster, “What-The Heck-I$-Next” World of the Business Freelancer!

Famines and Feasts; Droughts and Deluges:

The Roller-Coaster, "What-The Heck-I$-Next" World of the Business Freelancer!

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Declaring Independence:

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So you want to become a freelancer? Great! You are about to begin reaping the many rewards of leaving behind the traditional workplace!

Yup, kiss long commutes "goodbye." Say Sayonara to filling up your gas tank twice a week. Hasta la vista to workplace politics. Arivaderchi to a business suit and tie. Make sure to tell your cranky, miserable boss what you think of him or her as you depart the office for the last time. And get ready to spend your lunch-break getting out and seeing the world (I choose to spend mine walking our two Canaan-dogs through the forest which surrounds our home…and pausing on a bench to indulge in Ireland’s finest: a pint of Guinness).

Yup, become a work-from-home freelancer and just as the American Colonists did to George III and the British Empire…

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…declare your independence!

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We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and never having to work my butt off for peanuts while you take all of the credit!

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So you’ve gone ahead and done it! Perhaps you woke up this morning, thoughts of the classic movie Network in your head; you opened up your bedroom window, leaned out your head…and screamed at the top of your lungs "I’m mad as HELL and I’m not gonna take it anymore!" Then you proceeded to walk into your boss’s office and called him/her a piece of…

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Aw darn! I was just about to tell you not to do it like that!

You’ve made the biggest mistake possible…the same one I made. Freelancing should be a gradual transition, not one done spontaneously. You’ve gotta keep your regular job and ease your way into the freelance world. Yes, freelancing demands building up a customer and networking base prior to kissing your only source of income "goodbye!"

Why?

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The Freelancing Roller Coaster:

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Freelancing is a great life! You’re your own boss. You rely on yourself. You work when you want to work. You take breaks when you want to. Sound great?

There’s only one drawback. It’s now time to sink or swim.

And back to the title of this article: "Feasts and Famines…Droughts and Deluges!"

 I myself have had months when prospective customers and clients filled my Inbox to the point of overflowing. Yup…those months when I had enough to pay bills, take the wife out for some great candlelit dinners, some treats for the dogs and enough to fix the car (which seems to break down monthly).

 And I’ve had months when I barely managed to squeak by.

 And yes, Dear Prospective Freelancer: I’ve had months, especially in the beginning, when I sat by the phone waiting for that elusive call that never came. Checking my Inbox twenty, forty, eighty times a day…only to find it empty. Yes. I’ve had several months where the grand total of my earnings was $0.00.

 13 months into my career as a freelance writer, my average month is best categorized as "getting by." But then again, nobody that I know has expectations of becoming rich in this world. I guess it’s the price to be paid for freedom and independence.

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Never forget either to take into account the scourge of freelancers everywhere…yup, the dreaded DOWNTIME! Just finished a project? Then you’ll be waiting for that next client to contact you. Could take an hour. Could take a day. Could be weeks.

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No Guarantees:

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Nope: none, nada, zilch! No guarantees in the world of freelancing. Looking for financial stability? Perhaps this world is not for you. Looking for certainty? Don’t give up your day job or your cubicle just yet.

Looking for a car loan or mortgage? Just wait for the loan officer to ask you that infamous question: "How much do you earn each month Sir/Madam?" And you can give them that same answer I gave just seconds before being laughed at and told "Sir, come back when you get a ‘real job’." Yes, that answer…"Well, sometimes $2,000 a month, sometimes $200 a month."

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Freelancing is a wonderful life. Truth be told, I wouldn’t give up my freedom for anything.

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The decision to become a freelancer, however, necessitates forethought and a lot of planning.

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You need a great resume, testimonials and an operational portfolio.

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Without these three items, your chances of getting hired are slim indeed!

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The decision to become a freelancer should not be done spontaneously, impulsively or on a whim.

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Remember…it’s a world of "Feast or Famine!"

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Dear Reader: Thanks for stopping by! If you’ve enjoyed this original article, please consider giving it a "Retweet." I’d be most appreciative!

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Looking for a writer  yo*****@******************ip.com

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Yonatan Maisel is a business blogger, history buff and author.

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If you’re looking for a "lap-dog," look elsewhere; if you’re looking for a writer who will "kick ass and take names," he might be for you! 

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Yoni started a business blog one year ago. 90% of his new clients now find their way to him as a direct result of having read one or more posts. He is a regular contributor here at www.jobshuk.com.

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Image Credits:  RollerCoaster Cartoon: cashflowrollercoater.com; Declaration of Independence: cdn.indyposted.com;  Reality Check: freelife101.files.wordpress.com;  Swear Word: mrbarlow.files.wordpress.com;  Roller Coaster: filegets.com/screenshots;  Rolling Dice; Feast: targetwoman.com; Famine: cosmosmagazine.com; Dollar Sign: 1.bp.com; American Patriots: ksssar.org

“FRANKENBLOG!” Terrorizing the Countryside and Sowing Terror Into the Hearts of Business Bloggers Everywhere!

 

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FRANKENBLOG!

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Terrorizing the Countryside and Sowing Terror Into the Hearts of Business Bloggers Everywhere!

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Everybody who reads my business blog on a regular basis, especially the veteran readers, seem to be coming to a general consensus: My blog articles are becoming more and more wacky, eccentric, zany, light-hearted and farcical as the weeks and months pass by.

Firstly, nobody ever said that business-blogging needs to be only about business. Or serious. Secondly, we business bloggers are running out of things to say. How many more articles titled "10 Great Ways to Succeed With Social Media" can you, the reader, stand? Me? I’ll puke if I have to read another one!

My blog articles, as those who have followed me since the beginning can attest to, were quite a bit more conservative. A lot of information, tips and advice for sure, but very conservative and refined. So what’s going on? What’s with the transformation?

Quite simply, I have developed a blogging alter-ego. I have followed in the footsteps of the evil Dr. Frankenstein. I have taken on a new persona…

I have become a…

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Blogging Mad-Scientist!

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Almost daily, I step into my laboratory (actually it’s my home office), take out my beakers, test-tubes and vials (my pencil and paper) and mix up a new batch of potions (yup, my ideas).

I have (at least for the time being) ceased trying to come up with ordinary articles to attract readers and customers and have turned my attention to creating the uncanny, the freakish and half-baked. Yes, I am trying to turn my blog into a MONSTER which will ravage the countryside and instill terror and fear into the hearts and souls of my competitors.

To what do I owe this madness? This lunacy which readers seem to be loving, and this outlandishness which has brought clients and customers to my front door (actually my Inbox) at a rate I have never seen before?

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Putting the FUN Into Blogging:

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Yes! At some point, a juncture I’m unable to put my mental finger on, blogging, this 21st Century wunderkind business-tool, became FUN!

It’s an amazing thing about blogging (just as with anything in life)…once it becomes enjoyable, and no longer tedious, the mind opens up and the ideas begin to flow, en-masse…and naturally. No longer are things stiff and forced, they just seem to happen!

You can build a reputation and become a thought-leader and an authority, sometimes all the more so, by doing it "outside of the box." (I HATE that expression!)

If you are hating the idea of trying to churn out your next post…you’re thinking of it as unpaid-overtime for your full-time-job…STOP! Re-frame things. Think of it as an enjoyable task. A chance to play around. An opportunity to have fun and create! A forum to DARE to be different.

Okay. Perhaps you’re a doctor or lawyer. You need to be more serious. Not every profession has the same degree of freedom as a writer to be off-the-wall. But throw in a bit of witticism. Lighten things up a bit. Show your other side. Your human side. 

Blogging, for me, has stopped becoming something which I must do and has become something which I now look forward to doing. As a writer, it has become an additional creative outlet. It has become a fun form of communication. And it is paying dividends like never before in attracting readership and generating income.

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Okay, maybe I have gotten just a teeny bit carried away! I am a writer after all, one who is paid to bring creativity to the thoughts and ideas of others.

Yet there is some truth to my monstrous madness.

Business blogs are not, as the saying goes, "a-dime-a-dozen." It’s more like "a-dime-a-million." No matter your profession or your field of endeavor, as you sit down to type out your next article, rest assured, there are tens-of-thousands of your competitors doing the same exact thing. And all the while vying for that next paying customer.

It’s all about…

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Finding Your Own Unique Angle:

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There are many components which a business blog needs. Relevant and timely information. An educational slant. Wisdom. Insight. Value. Tips. Advice.

And there are some added pieces you can throw into the mix. Insight. Wit. Humor. Edginess. Banter. Levity. Etc…

But more than this, every business blog needs a unique ANGLE! A shtick. A different approach, outlook and perspective which in some way sets it apart from the crowd.

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The path I have chosen is mixing tips, advice and useful information with a dash of current-events, history, philosophy, news, humor, sports, slices-of-life, ramblings and other things that seem entertaining. It seems to be working…and filling a niche. Hey…who ever said that business blogs need only be about business?

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Whatever path you choose to take, here’s hoping that you find your distinctive, unparalleled and remarkable voice with which to speak to those millions of prospective readers and customers who are searching through Cyberspace for a person with whom to do business.

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As always, thanks for stopping by and if you’ve enjoyed this post, please consider re-tweeting:

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Until the next time…I’ll be in my lab whipping up another monstrous creation…

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_____________________

Looking for a writer  yo*****@******************ip.com

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Yonatan Maisel is a business blogger, history buff and author.

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If you’re looking for a "lap-dog," look elsewhere; if you’re looking for a writer who will "kick ass and take names," he might be for you! 

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Yoni started a business blog one year ago. 90% of his new clients now find their way to him as a direct result of having read one or more posts. He is a regular contributor here at www.jobshuk.com.

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Image Credits: Frankenstein: sonnerie-halloween.com; Mad Scientist: static.tvtropes.org; brownvboard.org; Angle: euclideanspace.com 

STRIPS, QUIPS, CLIPS and TIPS: 4 Ways to Transform Your BUSINESS BLOG Into a Readership Magnet!

 

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"STRIPS, QUIPS, CLIPS and TIPS": 4 Ways to Transform Your BUSINESS BLOG Into a Readership Magnet!

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So you’ve got a business blog or you’re thinking of starting one. There’s only one small problem. So do several million other businesspeople and businesses. And each and every one of those competitors is blogging for the next open job, project, contract, customer or client. In order to sell the commodities (goods and services) which you provide, you MUST set yourself apart in blogging, the 21st Century’s ultimate business tool!

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Yes, the world of business blogging has truly become an epic, dog-eat-dog, cut-throat battle for success and supremacy.

But keep your chin up: there is good news too! A vast majority of the business blogs you’ll find out there are black, mono-font-print on white background. They contain no photos, images, diagrams, graphics, video, color or, for that matter, life.

Though they might offer great, timely, relevant information, they can come across as bland. Dull. BORING! Not exactly good for Marketing and Advertising purposes when your goal is to demonstrate to prospects how dynamic and exciting you can be!

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Here are Four "…ips" (Strips, Quips, Clips & Tips)… to inject some life into your blog and help it and your great content stand out from the crowd! Think of them, if you need an analogy, as condiments to be added to your "Blog-Burger":

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   Vs 

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…some mustard, mayo, ketchup or pickles, perhaps:

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 STRIPS:

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I’ve written much on the value of adding pictures and graphics as a means of injecting life and a visual component into a business blog. Yes, you can find photos, drawings, infographics, and charts for use on the Internet. Just make sure that you credit the owner or the holder of the copy-write.

So how about adding a cartoon strip? They are eye-catching. They can very often be witty and humorous. They bring insight. And best of all: no matter the topic of your blog post, you can quite easily find one which corresponds with the subject you are writing about. There’s Dilbert and Peanuts, The Far Side and Calvin and Hobbes, and great sites like cartoonstock.com which offer free downloadable strips. 

Give it a try!

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 QUIPS:

For the purpose of blog articles, let’s think of quips as "quotes." Yes, those golden tidbits of written wisdom which have transcended the ages! Those gems of knowledge, advice and intuition.

I have used a single quote on many occasions to build an entire article around. Yup, five to ten to twenty words from a master of thought can be used as the catalyst and building-block for your next article.

Writing about greed? There’s one for you. Business? No problem. Motivation? You’ll find scores! From Maimonides to Plato, from Confucious to John Steinbeck, Einstein to AC-DC, from Emily Dickinson to Donald Trump…there are literally tens-of-thousands at your fingertips!

The best places to find quotes? Give Quote Garden, and ThinkExist a try. Their databases are filled to overflowing!

Find a great quote with business implications:

"Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail."  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

There you go…you’ve got a GREAT business article in the making!

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 CLIPS:

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A short video clip which is related to the subject-matter of your blog post is an IDEAL way to spice things up!

"Oh great," you say…"it’s ideal for people who can create video clips!" Yes. Perhaps it is, though I wouldn’t know. I can no more create a video than I can text on a cell-phone. I’m a technological idiot! But take solace: Sites like YouTube, Daily Motion and Google Videos have millions to choose from. For any subject you choose to blog about you will have no trouble at all finding one which relates to your topic of choice. Simply copy the HTML "embed" code and insert it into your article!

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 TIPS:

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It is, far and away, the number-one, numero-uno way to gain blog readership…offering insight, wisdom and acumen to your readers — all in the "how-to" format of dispensing useful tips and advice.

It establishes reputation and credibility, gives you thought-leader status and makes you the "go-to" person for people who are seeking to acquire knowledge. The goal? Impress your readers enough with your knowledge and "know-how" and perhaps they will turn to you as a paying customer or client. Take my word, IT WORKS!

But wait! Don’t get carried away. Don’t spill all of the beans. Too often I see people offering all the pieces to the puzzle. By doing this, you create a "How-To" manual for your readers. You teach them how to do it all by themselves. And you shoot yourself in the foot by negating the need for them to hire you. The key? Offer snippets and tidbits of advice!

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Dear Reader, As always, thanks for stopping by! I hope that you have found the contents of this original article to be useful, educational, or, in some way helpful. If so, perhaps you might consider giving it a "RE-TWEET!"

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_____________________

Looking for a writer  yo*****@******************ip.com

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Yonatan Maisel is a business blogger, history buff and author.

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If you’re looking for a "lap-dog," look elsewhere; if you’re looking for a writer who will "kick ass and take names," he might be for you! 

.

Yoni started a business blog one year ago. 90% of his new clients now find their way to him as a direct result of having read one or more posts. He is a regular contributor here at www.jobshuk.com.

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Image Credits: Magnet: totalwealthcoaching.com; Comic Strip: 3.bp; Quotation Marks: anitarachman.com; Movie Theatre: calgary.cityguide.ca; "Helpful Tips": jeanoram.com; Gold Star: cs.uwaterloo.ca       

It’s the Business Blogging Equivalent of “Where’s the Beef”: “Where’s the Sales-Pitch?”

 

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It’s the Business Blogging Equivalent of "Where’s the Beef": "Where’s the Sales-Pitch?"

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  "Beef also was difficult to be procured and exceedingly poor; the price nearly sixpence farthing per pound." —William Bligh (1754-1817; Captain of HMS Bounty)

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As a writer who, myself, began business blogging just over a year ago, I started things completely from scratch. My own blog, as well as the blogs I’m now hired to compose for other individuals and businesses, have undergone quite a bit of evolution and transformation, and through a process of trial-and-error, I have gone back to the drawing-board on more than one occasion.

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One of the things I have learned along my journey is that there is one thing that every business blog needs.

It is a necessity, not an option.

It is non-negotiable!

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Yup, you can provide your readers (all of whom happen to be prospective paying customers) with amazing content, wisdom, acumen, insight, humor, wit, tips and advice…and you can spice things up with great images and multimedia…

But it’s not enough! There is something missing.

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The Sales-Pitch:

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That’s right…the sales-pitch. In addition to all of the information listed above, it is crucial, critical and ESSENTIAL to remember why businesspeople blog and the number one goal of all of that writing they do: Selling Yourself and Your Business!

Yet, as important as this component of the blog is, I can attest, after reading literally thousands of posts, that it is, without a doubt, THE most ignored, overlooked and under-utilized part of blogging.

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A Fine Balance:

To borrow a quote from the legendary Johnny Cash: "I Walk the Line." Yes, it is walking the line with a sales-pitch. Too much pitch and you risk turning a blog article into a blatant advertisement…too little and you fail to sell yourself.

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Fox News Channel, YouTube and Sports Illustrated:

It is critical, CRITICAL, to entice readers to stick around after perusing your blog posts. You are, after all, trying to peddle your goods and services. You are seeking to persuade. Without a sales-pitch, sadly, you give your readers an easy-out to bolt from your article to check out the news, the latest football scores or the newest "viral" pickings on YouTube.

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The Sales-Pitch as an "Invitation":

A sales pitch is an invitation to your readers to stick around and find out more about you. Who you are. What you have to offer. Your great pricing. Your experience. Your testimonials from satisfied customers and clients and of course your portfolio.

Yup, it’s your opportunity to let people know why they should hire you!

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My Recommendation:

A sales-pitch contained in the blog post itself has the potential to turn people off.

Again, it can make a great blog post appear to be a blatant advertisement. 

It is best placed at the end of the article, as a by-line. Simply upload a picture of yourself (to personalize things), write a very brief bio telling people what you do and what you have to offer them…and perhaps most importantly, provide a link to your website homepage and/or profile.

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Keep in mind: Business-Blogging is about selling yourself. It’s the apex of modern Marketing and Advertising. You can write kick-ass posts and utilize Social Media to attract hordes of readers. If, however, you don’t PITCH yourself, you are effectively, and sadly, writing just for the heck of it! It’s an exercise in futility and a waste of time.

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Dear Reader, If you have enjoyed this original post or found it useful, please consider re-tweeting it. I would be appreciative and humbled:

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Image Credits: Where’s the Beef: 2.bp.blogspot.com; Car Salesman: images.thecarconnection.com; Tightrope Walker: swrightboucher; Fox News Alert: foxnews.com; Invitation: misquincemag; Advice: psychologytoday.com; Captain Bligh: hawkesburyhistory.org.au

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Looking for a writer

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Yonatan Maisel is a business blogger, history buff and author.

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If you’re looking for a "lap-dog," look elsewhere; if you’re looking for a writer who will "kick ass and take names," he might be for you! 

.

Yoni started a business blog one year ago. 90% of his new clients now find their way to him as a direct result of having read one or more posts. He is a regular contributor here at www.jobshuk.com.

DANGER! 5 Reasons to Never Write Another Business Blog Post Again…or Begin One: You’ve Been Warned!

 

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DANGER! 5 Reasons to Never Write Another Business Blog Post Again…or Begin One: You’ve Been Warned!

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I have, indeed, no abhorrence of danger, except in its absolute effect – in terror.

  –Edgar Allan Poe

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Yup, quote the raven nevermore…Now as promised, 5 excellent reasons not to blog for business:

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1) Free Time Down the Drain! Yup, I, myself, am now in the 13th month of blogging for business. I’ve gotten to the point where between 80-90% of my new clients now arrive at my front door as a direct result of having read my blog. Yes, prospective business blogger: It sucks! Don’t start! Think about going to the pub with your buddies. Think about fishing. Biking. Hiking. Oragami. Spelunking (cave exploration). Take into account all of those recreational and leisure activities you so love but will not have time for anymore. 

"You mean to tell me blogging is going to take up that much time?" you might be asking. "No!" is the emphatic answer. A successful blog can be had with no more than 2-4 hours of updating, writing, proofreading and editing each week. It’s something else that will be taking up time…

With all of the new clients, customers, work and projects you will unwittingly and inadvertantly generate as a result of your business blog…you can kiss a large chunk of free time goodbye! "Oh those days when I had time to meet my buddies for a pint of Guinness at our favorite ‘watering hole’," I say with a tear emerging from my eye. I have become a prostitute of capitalism!

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2) Taxes, Taxes, Taxes: Oh, that lousy, extra, cursed income! Another shitty consequence of those new clients and customers. Your income will increase by leaps and bounds and you will probably get knocked up to that next tax bracket. But take heart…the next time you see one of those road crews fixing potholes on your street, take pride in the fact that you are footing the bill! What a great civic-minded member of society you have become…and all because of your damn blog and that accursed extra income it brings in. Confound it!

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3) Please Mister Postman: So you’re thinking of starting a business blog and filling it with amazing content, knowledge, wisdom, insight as well as great tips and advice.

You fool!

Think of those hours you are now able to wallow away checking out flix on YouTube, reading on Facebook how Nancy found a buckwheat pillow for $5.99 at WalMart, and walking your dog.

You will now be spending an inordinate amount of time sifting through business inquiries and sending out resumes to those pesky people who want to hire you! Oh…the humanity!

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4) Priorities! Man, you’ve got to post something this evening after you finish work. It’ll only take about 45 minutes of writing. But damn it all to hell! You made the mistake of perusing the pages of TV Guide during the morning commute. There’s a Seinfeld rerun on cable tonight and it’s you’re favorite one: "I’m not ‘Shmoopy, you’re Shmoopy.’ Oh, the choices… 

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5) Eat Your Words! Yes, you’ve spent the last few years telling anybody and everybody you know who will listen "Blogging doesn’t work! You can’t make money doing it." Perhaps your mind is still stuck in the past when the sole purpose of a blog was dispensing the ingredients for your Aunt Margie’s chopped liver. Then you’ll find out the secret: extra clients and the added income they bring is the way to make money blogging. 

Then you’ll be forced to eat a big old slice of "humble pie" and admit that you were wrong. What a blow to your ego and self-esteem that will be!  

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Take my advice. Heed the warning of someone whose life has ended up in shambles as a result of business blogging. If I could turn the clock back, knowing what I know, I never would have started!

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Dear Reader: If you have enjoyed this post, please consider re-tweeting it. If you didn’t, Infidel, you are banished from this blog until doomsday! No exceptions!

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Image Credits: Skull and crossbones: jaspert.free.fr; Fishing: camdenny.com; Uncle Sam: jalopnik.com; Seinfeld: 2.bp.com;  Eat: thewritestart; Edgar Allan Poe: obit-mag.com; Question Mark: charlotte-personal-assistant.com  

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Looking for a writer

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Yonatan Maisel is a business blogger, history buff and author.

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If you’re looking for a "lap-dog," look elsewhere; if you’re looking for a writer who will "kick ass and take names," he might be for you! 

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Yoni started a business blog one year ago. 90% of his new clients now find their way to him as a direct result of having read one or more posts. He is a regular contributor here at www.jobshuk.com.

     

Find Waldo: How a Beloved Childrens’ Game Has Survival Implications In the BUSINESS World!

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Find Waldo: How a Beloved Childrens’ Game Has Survival Implications In the BUSINESS World!

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His name is Waldo. He’s the iconic "geek" we have all tried to find. With Coke-bottle glasses, red-and-white striped shirt and matching cap, he looks like the kid down the block we all knew in our childhood. In my case, the one who was conducting science experiments and dissecting electronic devices in his basement while I was playing baseball with friends. The one who was doing a high-school internship at IBM while I was spending my 16th summer pumping gas at Skip’s. Yes "Steven," you, the one who now works at NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory while I struggle to make ends meet as a freelance-writer and author.

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He’s the creation of British-born artist Martin Handford. It all began in 1987 with an illustrated book, Where’s Wally? And it has evolved into a series of books, comic-strip and video games. So popular has it been that it has been adopted in many foreign countries: From Germany where he’s known as "Walter," to Israel where he’s "Efi," to Iceland where he’s known as "Valli," to Denmark where they call him "Holger"…yup, from South America to the Far East and all points in between, people love to search for the beloved nerd!

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Find Waldo:

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In Business, Each and Every One of Us Is Waldo!

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In this dog-eat-dog 21st-Century madhouse that we call the business-world, each and every one of us is a single, solitary blip on a RADAR screen. We compete daily against thousands upon thousands of competitors, all of whom are trying to set themselves apart and be found and hired.

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One approach is to simply sit back and hope that prospective customers and clients will stumble upon you and your business by chance. That in the huge vacuum of Cyberspace, they will, against all odds, contact you. I tried this approach for the first three months of my small writing business. Take my word for it: it does not work! Initiative is required…

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So how does one go about getting him or herself found amongst all of the others who are vying for that next client or project? How does one avoid becoming a statistic in this world where business failures seem to be a dime-a-dozen? The answer comes straight from Waldo! It’s all about giving yourself visibility!  It’s about attracting paying-customers to your doorstep, website, telephone and inbox.

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I have found out, through trial-and-error, that the most effective way to succeed in business and to stand out from the crowd is with a business blog. A well-written, frequently-updated blog filled with great content, insight, wisdom and useful tips and advice is the key! It gets a person and a business noticed. It screams out loudly, "Here I am!" It establishes presence, credibility and reputation.

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Today, a business blog, along with a portfolio, testimonials and website, is no longer an optional Marketing and Advertising tool…it is a necessity! And with the proper use of Twitter and other forms of Social Media, you can direct the crowds straight to your blog. It’s just like a big billboard on the side of the highway which gets noticed by those passing by…

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Take a piece of advice. Make yourself unique. Make yourself bold, clear, singular, discernible and conspicuous! Show Pizzaz! Dare to be different! The crowds are huge. The odds of being found by chance are astronomical. Make yourself easier to find!

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Be a Waldo!

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Image Credits: Waldo Waving: ordable.com; Waldo In Store: thecaptainsmemos.com; Waldo at Football Game: stephenrspeaks; Businesspeople: crestock.com; Billboards: novideobillboard.ca; Human Waldo: ChicagoNow.com

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Yonatan Maisel is a business blogger, history buff and author. If you’re looking for a "lap-dog," look elsewhere; if you’re looking for a writer who will "kick ass and take names," he might be for you! Yoni started a business blog one year ago. 90% of his new clients now find their way to him as a direct result of having read one or more posts. Unfortunately for the foreseeable future, Yonatan is not accepting new clients. He is a regular contributor here at www.jobshuk.com.

 

12,000 (Yup, Twelve Thousand!) Eye-Catching Ways to Spice Up Your Business Blog Posts!

 

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12,000 (Yup, Twelve Thousand!) Eye-Catching Ways to Spice Up Your Business Blog Posts!

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A picture is worth  words!

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Think about it…a thousand sensational, eye-catching, thought-provoking words if you choose wisely…

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Yet with this absolutely incalculable value, it still shocks the living daylights out of me how many bloggers fail to add this critical piece to the business blogging puzzle. It’s so darn easy to do and it is a way to speak VOLUMES to your readers, all of whom must be thought of as prospective paying-customers. It’s time to "dress up" your blog and make it stand out from the crowd! You are after all trying to sell yourself, your goods and your services. It is an effective way to avoid the number one, numero-uno, cardinal rule of business blogging: don’t bore your readers!

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Keep in mind: Multimedia is not a substitute for great content, but it does do wonders to enhance and accentuate it!

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A photograph, drawing, sketch, diagram, chart or table which directly relates to the written piece, enhances the "gist" of the article and draws readers in. It can, and does, act as the proverbial foot in the door, that initial component which can so effectively capture your readers’ attention and imagination!

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Think appearance doesn’t matter? Let’s say you were looking to buy a newspaper at your local newsstand. Which do you think is more exciting? This…

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          Or this? 

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When you read a book, which do you prefer? This…

        Or this?     

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If you’re like most people, you probably prefer books with some great pictures and illustrations…visuals which catch your eye and break up the monotony of endless black and white pages. Visuals which bring the text to life! And perhaps when it comes to getting your daily dose of print-news you turn to a paper like USA Today (pictured above) with its great colored graphics, vivid pictures, graphs and info-charts. It’s one of the reasons why the paper continues to thrive while others are folding! Humans are after all visual creatures…by our nature we love looking at cool things.

Writing a new posting? Along with being informative and educational…be imaginative. Be creative. Stick some great pics in with all of that white background and black mono-font text:

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And if a picture is worth a thousand words, do the math: Two are worth two thousand; Five are worth five-thousand…and so on! If you have a posting with 500 words and you add two great pics, you’ve now got, in essence, a 2,500-word article!

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  Words!

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And if a simple picture is worth a thousand words, a great video clip which is directly related to the subject matter of your blog is worth 10,000!

Find a great, relevant video clip from YouTube, LiveVideo or Dailymotion, preferably one which is impactful without being too long…and embed it in your blog post.

Penning your latest post on demonstrating confidence and competence while climbing the proverbial corporate ladder? Show ’em how a pro does it in this great clip!

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Uploading pictures and embedding video can dramatically increase the 
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of a well-written article. So along with your great tips, advice, knowledge, wisdom and acumen, start searching for great material to use! It is simple to do and the payout can literally be measured in the thousands!
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Make your postings  to read. Use wit, humor, insight and create something unique. Let your readers enjoy the feast for the senses which you provide!
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Just remember to credit the owners(s) of the media which you choose to use!
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And never, ever forget the most important picture of all…your photo somewhere in the blog. It shows your readers who you are and makes an instant personalized connection!
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Do the math…
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…one picture, one video and your personal photo in a business article…that’s already 12,000 words!
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Image Credits: 12,000: 12000.org; "1,000": fairsoftware.net; Earth: researchpark.arc.nasa.gov; Charlie Chaplin: ynotvote.net; Car: 3.bp.; Ladder: professional-power-tool-guide.com; Plain text page: www4.harrisbank.com; Text page with illustrations: cache1.asset-cache.net; Text with illustrations: Graph: pcwin.com; Money: news-libraries.mit.edu; "10,000": pullthecork.files: Dog Climbing Ladder Video: supernaturlabc2008; Quality: nanophase.com; Blackboard: francis.org; Illustrated Book: foliosociety.org
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Yonatan Maisel is a business blogger, history buff and author. He started a business blog one year ago. 90% of his new clients now find their way to him as a direct result of having read one or more posts. Unfortunately for the foreseeable future, Yonatan is not accepting new clients. He is a regular contributor here at www.jobshuk.com.

A Great Lesson in Business Efficiency from Genius Inventor and Engineer Rube Goldberg (Article & Video)

 

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Lessons in Business Efficiency from Genius Inventor and Engineer Rube Goldberg (Article and Video)

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In the course of modern history, perhaps no individual has made things more complicated, complex and unnecessary than the beloved, iconic and fascinating Rube Goldberg.

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Reuben Lucius Goldberg (1883-1970) was born in San Francisco, California. He graduated from the University of California Berkeley with a degree in Engineering. He was a Pulitzer Prize winning cartoonist, engineer and inventor best known for his series of complex diagrams and renderings of machines and contraptions which turned the most simple, mundane, everyday tasks into intricate, elaborate, multi-step, time-wasting complexities.

The end-product? They are fascinating, and when they are built and put to the test, they actually work!

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How about a few examples

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Need to put toothpaste on your toothbrush? Forget about just squeezing the tube in the ordinary manner. Give this one a try:

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Care to fill a glass with water? Don’t just pour it from a pitcher…give this device a whirl:

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Don’t believe that these devices actually work? Check out a video of a Rube Goldberg machine in action. There are contests held regularly to design and test these contraptions with major universities and engineering clubs as sponsors.

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Check out this absolutely incredible short YouTube clip of a Rube Goldberg cocktail-making machine:

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Now you get the picture!
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But We Are In the World of Business!
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I once took a computer programming course. After studying for several months, I was asked to write code in the C+ language to solve a not-very-difficult problem. It took me several hours and the code was approximately 50 lines long. My teacher then demonstrated to me how it could be done in 3 lines in less than five minutes. It was the epiphany moment when I realized that computer programming was not for me!
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The world of business is a rat-race. In this 21st Century, high-pressure, dog-eat-dog environment, it’s about getting things done quickly, effectively and most importantly…efficiently! It’s about finding simple, elegant, time-saving solutions for the problems, tasks and projects that we must complete.
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I’ve been a fan of this legendary man and visionary thinker ever since I was a youngster playing Ideal’s classic board-game Mouse Trap and reading Charles Keller’s The Best of Rube Goldberg.
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Rube Goldberg was a genius! His thinking led to some very unique and highly-entertaining concepts. But in the world of business you must ask yourself this simple question…
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…Am I making things more difficult than they need to be?
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Image Credits: Rube Goldberg: nnndb.com;  Toothpaste Diagram: dashboards.tv.com; Filling Water Giagram: pomperaug.com; cityscape: supercheats.com
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Yonatan Maisel is a business blogger, history buff and author. He started a business blog one year ago. 90% of his new clients now find their way to him as a direct result of having read one or more posts. Unfortunately for the foreseeable future, Yonatan is not accepting new clients. He is a regular contributor here at www.jobshuk.com.