Welcome to my new Parshat HaShavua series discussing business principles and ethics as they relate to the weekly Torah portion.
You may be wondering where the first 2 volumes of this series are. They were delivered on Shabbat, and are still in my head. I’ll put them in here soon before I forget, no worries.
As a further note of introduction, this explanation was given on this page prior to the joke that I’ve inserted at the bottom.
"Nisht in Shabbos Gereht" is an expression that religious Jews use on the Sabbat when they are about to say something inappropriate for discussion on the Sabbat day.
Parshat Chayei Sara begins with one of the Torah’s most famous business deals – Avraham’s purchase of Mearat HaMachpeila from Ephron HaChiti. The point most often made emphasizes the honesty of Avraham and the conniving greed of Ephron. Honesty and greed aside, Avraham might have "sensed" the future turmoil over the ownership of this land. He knew that he had to protect his investment in such a way that the transaction could not be questioned and invalidated. He insisted on paying full price for the land, and even a bit more, so that the deal would be done and that no one else could stake claim to it.
We see a similar situation a bit later in the Parsha with Eliezer. Eliezer makes a deal with Avraham to take a wife for Yitzchak from Avraham’s family, not from the Canaanites. He also makes a deal with Hashem to make some signs come true so that he knows which girl is the right one. When Hashem presents him with Rivka through the signs, Eliezer gives her gifts, and then confirms that she is, in fact, from Avraham’s family. When telling over the story to Rivka’s family, he feels the need to change the order, such that he asked about her family before giving the gifts. It seemed to Eliezer that her family would object to the true nature of the events. Perhaps they see it strange that he gave her gifts without knowing her family, perhaps they didn’t believe in Hashem’s help that the fulfillment of the sign meant this girl was Avraham’s family too. Perhaps they would see the gifts as a present to a girl, and not a proposal and betrothal, which would entitle them to the gifts without requiring the marriage. Regardless, Eliezer believed he had to tell the story this way, and then hurry Rivka out of there, to secure this deal and avoid complications.
Like Avraham and Eliezer, we should protect our investments, especially those important to us. We shouldn’t involve ourselves in too much negotiation. We should secure the deal and make sure there is no ill will, and continue on our journey.
And now, the awful joke, as mentioned above:
These two guys are sitting in Shul on Shabbat morning when the first guy says to the second, rather quietly and secretively. "Nisht in Shabbos Gereht, but I’ve just put my car up for sale."
The second guy responds, just as quietly and just as secretively. "Nisht in Shabbos Gereht, but what kind of car is it?"
First guy: "Nisht in Shabbos Gereht, but it’s a Cadillac, late model, low mileage, and is in creampuff condition."
Second Guy. "Nisht in Shabbos Gereht, but how much are you asking for it?"
First Guy. "Nisht in Shabbos Gereht, but I’m asking 15 thousand dollars."
Second Guy. "Nisht in Shabbos Gereht, but let me think about it."
They meet again in the afternoon at Mincha, when the second guy corners the first guy and says quietly, "Nisht in Shabbos Gereht, but I’ll offer you 12 for it."
The first guy responds. "Nisht in Shabbos Gereht, but I sold it already."